Regional Planning Forum: Building Relationships and Resolving Conflict

·         Roles in Conflict Resolution

·         Decision maker – arbitrator

·         Participant – negotiator

·         Facilitator – participant, non-neutral

·         Facilitator – neutral

·         Sounding Board – coach

·         Avoid/make assumptions/stir the pot

Regional Planning Forum. June 10, 2015.

 

·         Causes of Conflict

·         Relationships

·         Interests

·         Data

·         Values

·         State of mind

·         Structural

·         Interest Based Approach to Mediation

·         Position

·         Statement of what you want to happen

·         Preferred outcome

·         Interests

·         The needs that have to be met to make a satisfactory outcome

·         Will clearly answer the question of ‘why’

·         Will explain the significance or impact of an event or outcome

·         Motivators, criteria, goals or objectives

·         An interest should be positively framed

·         Substantive interests

·         Quality

·         Quantity

·         Efficient/effective

·         Procedural Interests

·         Participation/input

·         Be heard

·         Ownership of outcome

·         Informed choices

·         Legitimacy

·         Psychological Interests

·         Dignity/respect

·         Valued/recognition

·         Identity

·         Reputation

·         Satisfaction Triangle

·         Substantive > Procedural > Psychological > Substantive

·         Assumptions

·         Private

·         Intent (motives)

·         Messages

·         Effect (impact)

·         Filter

·         Based on beliefs, values, relationships, frame of mind

·         These filters bias how messages are received and communicated

·         Public

·         Actions

·         Words

·         Events

·         Process Choices

·         Decide alone

·         Consult with other but retain authority

·         Consensus

·         Reciprocity: social obligation to give back to you the form of behaviour you first give me

So What

·         The filter between private and public is both good and bad

·         Interest Based Questins

·         Understand why without asking why

·         What important to you

·         What would that accomplish

·         What is the impact

·         3Ps Check in

·         People

·         Psychology

·         Validation

·         What can you agree with?

·         Interests

·         Impact

·         We don’t need to be defensive, apologize if appropriate because it is a ‘marvellous problem solving’ method

·         Sounding Board

·         Validation and challenge

·         Acknowledge the impact

·         Opportunity to look at alternative points of view

·         Challenge to take positive first steps to resolve

·         Raising Issues

·         State the situation from your perspective. What has been your experience?

·         What has been the significance or the impact of this satiation to you personally? (use “I” language)

·         Get a commitment to work to create a change that is acceptable for both of you.